First Love

Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease let this work.

So little to say but so much time,
Despite my empty mouth
the words are in my mind.
Please wear the face,
the one where you smile,
Because you lighten up my heart
when I start to cry.

Forgive me first love, but I'm tired.
I need to get away to feel again.
Try to understand why,
don't get so close to change my mind.
Please wipe that look out of your eyes,
it's bribing me to doubt myself;
Simply, it's tiring.

This love has dried up and stayed behind,
And if I stay I'll be alive,
Then choke on words I'd always hide.
Excuse me first love, but we're through.
I need to taste the kiss from someone new.

Forgive me first love, but I'm too tired.
I'm bored to say the least and I,
I lack desire.
Forgive me first love,
Forgive me first love,
Forgive me first love,
Forgive me first love,
Forgive me,
Forgive me first love,
Forgive me first love

Call Your Name

You never said, you never said, you never said that it would be this hard
Love is meant to be forever, now or never seems to discard
There's gotta be a better way for me to say
What's on my heart without leaving scars
So can you hear me when I call your name?

And when you fall apart am I the reason for your endless sorrow?
There's so much to be said
And with a broken heart your walls can only go down but so low
Can you hear me when I call your name?
When I call your name

Complicated situations are the makings of all that's wrong
And I've been standing in the river of deliverance way too long
There's gotta be a better way for me to say
What's on my heart without leaving scars
So can you hear me when I call your name?
So can you hear me when I call your name?

And when you fall apart am I the reason for your endless sorrow?
There's so much to be said
And with a broken heart your walls can only go down but so low
Can you hear me when I call your name?

You never said, you never said, you never said, you never said
When I call your name
You never said, you never said, you never said, you never said
When I call your name

And when you fall apart am I the reason for your endless sorrow?
There's so much to be said
And with a broken heart your walls can only go down but so low
Can you hear me when I call your name?

And when you fall apart am I the reason for your endless sorrow?
There's so much to be said
And with a broken heart your walls can only go down but so low
Can you hear me when I call your name?

I'm an emo elmo.

Because history repeats itself. And i don't think i could take another three years of the exact same treatment.

DISENGAGE NOW. BEFORE ITS TOO LATE. AND EVERYTHING GOES TO HELL AGAIN. I'm sick of hurting.

Stain On My Conscience

I'm afraid of what law school is turning me into.

If i have been nasty (and i know i have), please forgive me. All this talk of elitism, of intelligence, of brilliant futures count for nothing if theres only silence to talk to. So friends, give me a chance to find my footing and reach a balance between who i am on campus and who i am off campus.

Sorry to CHM, Sirong, Jon, ZR, Nat and anyone else i've snapped at. I promise imma try to be a better person :D

"Everything's falling, and I am included in that
Oh, how I try to be just okay"




In other news, i've not been devoting all my time to schoolwork! Its uber frustrating when i've counted just the right amount of time for work but my will is weak and i end up spending more hours or doing less work. It does not help that you are so distracting. But of course i meant that in a good way.